CONDENSED REVIEWS: OSCAR BEST PICTURE NOMINEES

Another year another round of Oscars. Unlike other years, the nominations weren’t the worst this time around, so Elizabeth and I decided to get on our horses high and judge them in almost staccato bursts of critiquism. Agree or disagree? Film talk times are fun times.

Amour (2012) Poster

Amour:

Harry – Whatever. I didn’t need my heart anyway, tragic and beautiful old people.

Elizabeth – Makes The Notebook look like a lighthearted whimsical rom-com.

 

Argo (2012) PosterArgo:

Harry – Most suspenseful movie you already know the end of ever. Stick Affleck behind a camera and he is god.

Elizabeth – Intense, absorbing and I’ve never felt so stressed in a film as I did during the climactic scene. Great as a movie, questionable as an interpretation of the true event.

 

Beasts of the Southern Wild (2012) PosterBeasts of the Southern Wild:

Harry – Little girl wins heart of the world and out-acts the shit out of everyone ever.

 

 

 

Django Unchained (2012) Poster Django Unchained:

Harry – Christoph Waltz and Leo Dicaprio being amazing in the most fun film about slavery of the year that also contains inexplicable Aussie ockers.

Elizabeth – Like a modern day Blazing Saddles where Jamie Foxx and Christoph Waltz shoot people and collect bounty. It’s pretty excellent.

Les Misérables (2012) PosterLes Miserables:

Harry – Wins with live singing and Hathaway and Jackman, but loses with irritatingly repetitive close up solos and Russell Crowe’s vocals. Save by the ever amazing music.

Elizabeth – I similarly dreamed a dream that Russel Crowe was not playing Javert. Strong performances and interesting risk with the live recording. However not as epic as anticipated.

Life of Pi (2012) PosterLife of Pi:

Harry – Proves in the last ten minutes that it is so very much more than just a beautiful visual smorgasbord. Stunning.

Elizabeth –  A boy, a boat, and a tiger shouldn’t be so visually stunning or engaging but it all just works.

 

Lincoln (2012) PosterLincoln:

Harry – Daniel Day and Sally Field being amazing in the most surprisingly dull film about slavery of the year. Someone please give Spielberg back his sense of adventure.

Elizabeth – Follows the last few months of Lincoln’s life as he attempts to put through the 13th amendment. Slow, long and could benefit from being edited down about an hour, any Oscars that this film gets should go straight to Daniel Day Lewis.

Silver Linings Playbook (2012) PosterSilver Limings Playbook:

Harry – Great actors going to town on a fantastic script in a genuinely moving film about many shades of depression and mental illness.

Elizabeth – The poster doesn’t do justice to the gravity and importance of this film. A realistic portrayal of mental disease wrapped in a package that screams “chick flick”. Weird marketing, good film.

Zero Dark Thirty (2012) PosterZero Dark Thirty:

Harry – more like Zero Dark Whatever, amiright? I was actually really underwhelmed by this, I don’t even care enough to critique properly. Jessica Chastain was good, but her character had no depth whatsoever.

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About H D Thompson

Film lover. Acerbic viewer of the world. actuallyharry.com @actuallyharry
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One Response to CONDENSED REVIEWS: OSCAR BEST PICTURE NOMINEES

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